Day 15,341

Twenty one years ago, I turned twenty one. It will go down in history as the day I may have made the single-most worst decision of my life. Was it the worst decision or was it a good one? Who knows. Things could have been better had I taken another path, yet again, they could be worse. All I know is that I hope I am smarter in the next twenty one years. Happy 21st Birthday to me....times two.

Snow and More Snow!

The news keeps talking bout another snow storm that is coming tonight. More. Haven't we reached our quota yet? We received our last major dumping on Sunday, January 18. The only ones enjoying the snow are the dogs! Here are some photos from that day.

My new talent!

I found a new talent that I had on Thursday night, that I didn't know I had. While getting geared up for derby practice, someone asked me what size shoe I wore, to which I replied a 5 1/2. See, I have small feet and small hands, I'm just no longer small in between.

Someone then told me that they knew someone with small hands that was able to put their entire fist in their mouth. She told me that she thought I could. So, I tried. And I can. The first time I did it, I actually had wrist guards on and my mouthguard it. It was much easier without both.

Now before anyone makes the comment that I have a big mouth, I don't have a big mouth, I have small hands! I know, you are sitting here thinking that's not hard. Go ahead, try it. Not everyone can do this.

I will add this to hanging four spoons off of my face and imitating a chicken. I am taking my show on the road soon.

I pimped my ride!

After a year of skating on my new, expensive purple skates, I finally admitted that the plates are too heavy and they are contributing to my back and hip pain. I started wearing my old, cheap skates again and I have fallen back in love with derby.

Well, after having purple skates for a year, it pained me to skate with plain, old black ones. So, I decided to pimp them out!

Here is what they looked like before.

I was too lazy to take the wheels off, so I just masked around them.

I sprayed them with two coats of Outdoor paint.

I then prayed them with a matte finish, clear sealer.

After they dried, I applied Modge Podge where I wanted the racing strips to be, and then I put some gold glitter in a salt shaker and shook it over the stripes area, then dusted off the excess.

Once that dried, I sealed the glitter to the skate with another coat of Modge Podge.

Here is the finished product - A purplelicious set of skates with gold strips, what better way to represent Ford City than with the good old purple and gold!

Dumpster Diving!

I went dumpster diving for the first time on Monday. My BFF Jill has been raving about it for sometime. She invited me to go and I jumped at the chance.

The first thing that surprised me was that we did it in the daylight. I thought that it would be something that you do at night. Well, I was wrong.

We scored on the first one we look in behind a book store, it was filled with books. Usually the covers are ripped off, these were perfectly intact. Also, the dumpster was closed, so no snow got in. We scored some cool books, my favorite was a book on Marilyn Monroe.

We scored BIG TIME behind Bed, Bath and Beyond. Jill scored a toaster oven, a small table, a shoe rack, lamp, and a 7 inch digital photo frame! I got a large ceramic heater and a chilled condiment server.

I can't wait to do this again. Next time, we are bringing a pool ladder so that we can climb up, turn around, then climb down. Also a pole with a hook on it is a must!

Here We Go Steelers - Spanish Style!

While we were in Punta Cana, I was a little bummed that I wouldn't be able to see the Steeler game. Well imagine my surprise when I found it on the TV. In Spanish. I decided that I HAD to video the TV because it was so funny. I managed to pick the third quarter Heath Miller touchdown. I should have kept recording because they were just going on and on in Spanish saying Ben and Heath's name.

When we were at the airport, checking in to go home, there were seven flights leaving that day. Funny how the Baltimore and Pittsburgh flights were side by side. I just had to take a picture of that!

HERE WE GO STEELERS, HERE WE GO!!

Mr. Speedo? Hell NO!

I've seen enough Speedos to last a lifetime, ever since my vacation to Punta Cana. They were everywhere. Speedos are awful. Even when you are in shape, they look horrible.

You can see, these three guys are in fairly good shape, yet they look ridiculous in these Speedos! I guess it is nice that their upper thighs get tanned, but it's just not doing it for me.

Then you got the pudgies.

And the muffin tops.

Guys, your swim attire should never be as small as your girl's

And should never, ever, EVER be smaller!

I'm too sexy for my Speedos, too sexy for my Speedos, to sexy for my Speedos!

Then you have the "Peek a Boo, I see You" when they throw on a shirt.  Come on, put on some pants!  This is the lovely scene you see at the lunch buffet.

Then there is this guy.  His swim suit is smaller than his wife's.

Then he has to carry on a conversation with a perfect stranger, almost naked, scratching is ass.

His daughter is crying because she is scared of the Speedo!

And now for the finalists in the 2009 Speedo Hell No pageant. We have in fourth place. The front view was better, but I didn't get a photo of it.

In third place, we have the man channeling Jabba the Hut from his belly

In second place, we have The Sasquatch! 

Finally, Mr. Speedo Hell No 2009!  I have no words.  My mouth is still hanging wide open a week later.  The best part was that Mr. Bruises spotted this one and kicked me to grab the camera!